Clean Slate Club

Have you ever just wanted to pick up and move to a new town or city where no one knows you: where you can get a fresh start; where you can remake yourself; where you can start with a clean slate? Many people do just that. They pick up and move. For many it can be a leap of faith of sorts. Moving without a job or a place to live. For others it has been long in the making, much preparation has gone into a new beginning.  Some are very successful. They take the opportunity of a fresh start and run with it. They intentionally choose a different path than the one they left behind. A healthier, happier path. One that involves doing the hard work that they have avoided in the past. Others are not so successful. They bring their old habits and hang ups with them. They choose to seek out the same unhealthy relationships with people that pull them backwards instead of forward. They choose to repeat past patterns that land them in the same misery they experienced in their previous community. Their fresh start, their clean slate ends up dingy and dirty after only a short time.

Is there really the possibility of a clean start? Can we just move to a new locale and magically become a different person? The short answer is, "No."

We bring all of our emotional, spiritual, relational baggage with us wherever we go. Until we deal with those issues and even when we do, we cannot be magically wiped clean.

There is one person who can wipe at least one part of our past clean. Jesus Christ can give us a clean slate in regards to the punishment for the sins we have committed. Through him we find healing. "But he was pierced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on him, and by his wounds we are healed" (Isaiah 53:5, NIV). That being said, he cannot do the hard work for us of processing and healing from past abuses, from old wounds, from pain inflicted by our fellow man. We have to do that. The good news is that he will walk with us each step of the way helping us to keep moving forward.

So a clean slate, a fresh start without any baggage, that magically happens? No. A second chance, sins wiped clean, hope? Yes and Amen! A new life, a new direction, a path to healing and wholeness? Absolutely! Found in the journey of following Christ, one step at time. A journey that may not be easy or quick but worth every drop of sweat, worth every tear shed. Why? To become a person shaped by their past but not controlled by it. A person who embraces who they are and strives to be who they are continuing to become. A person who looks beyond themselves and grasps the divine. That is the type of clean slate, I want.

What baggage are you carrying around today that is keeping you from going a new direction? What are you reaching for today?

the Weight of Waiting

I have a hidden talent and when you hear what it is you are going to be green with envy or maybe not. You see, I have this innate ability to choose the wrong line. It does not matter which store I enter, when I arrive at the front of the store with my cart or arms full of merchandise to purchase, 9 times out of 10 I choose the wrong line. It's a gift, I know! Even when I carefully observe the amount of items others in line have to purchase, the speed of the checker, their chattiness or lack thereof, I still choose the slowest line in the joint. My record is 10 for 10 when I am in a hurry. When I have to be somewhere else at a certain time and that time is fast approaching...wrong line. There I stand with my foot tapping, mind mentally clicking down the minutes while simultaneously trying to decide if I hop to another line. Fear keeps me stuck in the same line. Fear that if I move to another line it might actually be slower. Fear that if I walk away from my spot, as bad as it is, I will lose said spot and thereby cause myself to wait even longer. You see my conundrum?!

Why is waiting so difficult? Why does five minutes in line at the store seem like forever? I spend five times that looking at social media thinking I am only spending a measly five minutes. It's all relative. All waiting is relative to the object of our waiting.

I find myself hating the waiting. Waiting for the door to open. Waiting to get to where I am going. Waiting for my timing to line up with God's timing. Just waiting.

I know that waiting is not a new thing. In fact is it quite an ancient thing. The scriptures are full of waiting. Psalms has much to say on the theme of waiting on the Lord. Here are just a few.

"Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD" (Psalm 27:14, NIV).

"We wait in hope for the LORD; he is our help and our shield" (Psalm 33:20, NIV).

"Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him" (Psalm 37:7a, NIV).

"I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope" (Psalm 130:5, NIV).

I understand that what I am waiting for is nothing compared to being delivered from enemies who are out to do me physical harm or being enslaved by another country like the psalmists. I get that my life is not horrible. It is actually pretty good. That being said, I still hate waiting.

"Lean into it," people say. "Focus on learning what you need to learn during this time," they say. These well-meaning words are nice and all but not very helpful.

So, what is my point? Waiting is difficult. Waiting can be miserable and frustrating. Waiting can seem like forever. How I decide to spend my time waiting is what matters. In the slow line at the store, I can either tap my toes in frustration or have a conversation with the other people in line. While looking at closed doors, I can either get mad or I can keep moving forward by trying another door.

I want to live life while I wait.  

What are you waiting for? How do you live life while waiting? Share your best tips for making waiting bearable.

Extraordinary You

Have you ever really looked at a seed? Most seeds are pretty plain, unassuming, lack luster. They seem dead. They are strewn everywhere by the wind and critters. Somehow one falls into good soil and receives the water and nutrients it needs. It is almost miraculous in many ways to watch it become what it was meant to be. Whether a beautiful flower, a tomato plant, or a majestic tree, it began with an ordinary looking seed. It went from ordinary to extraordinary. The many obstacles it must survive, like attacks by bugs, being trampled by an animal, droughts, or disease makes it all the more extraordinary.  

Sometimes I feel utterly ordinary, lack luster, plain. Forgetting that all I am created to be was placed in me from the beginning of time. Ever been there? Flooded with doubt and overwhelmed by the ordinariness of your life?

In these moments, I am drawn to an event, a celebration where Jesus takes something mundane, plain, utilitarian, and makes it into something extravagant, excellent, extraordinary. We find Jesus at a wedding in Cana. He is celebrating with friends and family. Enjoying making memories with those he loved. A little problem arose, they ran out of wine. Now to us this seems simple enough. Go to the store and get more. Not so, in those days. Jesus' mom, Mary, comes to him to tell him of this issue. His reply, "Dear woman, that's not our problem," (John 2:4a). Mary instructs the servants to do whatever Jesus tells them to do, in essence ignoring her son's reply. Then as you may or may not know, Jesus does something amazing.

"Standing nearby were six stone jars, used for Jewish ceremonial washing. Each could hold twenty to thirty gallons. Jesus told the servants, 'Fill the jars with water.' When the jars had been filled, he said, 'Now dip some out, and take it to the master of ceremonies.' So the servants followed his instructions.

When the master of ceremonies tasted the water that was now wine," (John 2: 6-9a, NLT).

Jesus took jars that usually held water for washing the Jews feet and hands, and did something jaw dropping, something unexpected, something awesome. He took ordinary water and turned it into wine. Not just wine but "the best" (v. 10c) wine. He made the ordinary into something extraordinary.

God's plan has always been to take ordinary ol' me and ordinary ol' you and make us extraordinary. "For we are God's masterpiece. He created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago" (Ephesians 2:10, NLT). A masterpiece is created by taking something ordinary and making it extraordinary. We are more like the seed than the water. All that is needed to live an extraordinary life is within us, placed there by God from the beginning of time. It begins to grow when we encounter Jesus, planting ourselves in good soil. It is nourished by spending time with Jesus. It flourishes when we continually strive to follow him - to be like him and to do things like he does. Sometimes we struggle and go through difficult times. Sometimes we feel trampled. Sometimes we are faced with horrible illness. Even so, in time we become what we were meant to be all along - extraordinary masterpieces. Our ordinary is molded, shaped, and transformed into extraordinary.

  

What is holding you back from becoming extraordinary? What stands in the way of you flourishing?

Spring Forward

It's my favorite time of year. To see the promises of life coming from seeming death. A little back story on my life. I grew up on the western side of Washington state where it is green and lush year round. The evergreen trees are tall and ominous. Always green. Always full and beautiful. Then I moved to the eastern side Washington state where the trees are deciduous. Full and beautiful in the spring and summer and most of fall, but barren and gloomy through winter. They seem dead. Sparse and spindly. Not at all beautiful. Not at all green. Three to four months of drab, gray, lifeless scenery.  Then it happens. You begin to see crocus peek out of the ground followed by the tulip leaves. Little hints. Little promises that there is life after all. Hope that there once again will be green, lush leaves filling the sky. 

Sometimes life is drab, gray, and well, lifeless (not in the "I'm dead call the coroner" kind of way), but in the spiritual kind of way. The dark night of the soul it is sometimes called. Maybe it is just a season where you are just hanging on by a thread to life let alone your faith. I've been there. I hope to not go back anytime soon.

I am encouraged by the prophet Isaiah's words. 

                "Forget the former things;

                      do not dwell on the past.

                See, I am doing a new thing!

                       Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

                 I am making a way in the wilderness

                        and streams in the wasteland."  Isaiah 43:18-19

I don't need to dwell on the past lushness of my life. It will only bring me sorrow at its loss and I may miss the new thing that God is doing in my midst. Focus on the next step. Spring forward. Trust that there will be a path to follow and water to bring new life. The barren, drab, gray scenery of your life may be just on the verge of something new, something green and lush, something worth the journey, worth the waiting. Don't give up yet. Keep looking for the small hints, the little signs that spring is just around the corner.

What are you dwelling on today? What seems barren and lifeless? Where do you see signs of life?

Becoming

Photo by Kristyn Rhynard

I gave up my drug of choice, sugar, a few weeks ago. Along with it I said goodbye to sugar's friend, caffeine. I think they are cousins or maybe 3rd cousins twice removed. Anyway, it has been an interesting journey full of crankiness, headaches, blah feeling and cravings the size of Texas. On the other side of all that is this wonderful and amazing gift - clear thought. The fog has lifted. It's a glorious thing!

You may be asking, "Kathy, whatever possessed you to do such a thing?" Well, here it is the big reason, the "why" behind my choice, the driving force that has kept me going - I want to be who I am becoming. I don't want to be the same old me. I desire to be the woman I am becoming and to do that I had to change. That is how it works, you know. If you don't change then you stay the same. There is no 'becoming' because there is no forward movement, no metamorphosis.

It is not an easy peasy thing to change. It is hard work. It often involves blood, sweat, and tears - sheer grit and a lot of help.

Before time began, God knew who he was creating you and I to be.

"For you created my inmost being;

                you knit me together in my mother's womb.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;

                your works are wonderful,

                I know that full well.

My frame was not hidden from you

                when I was made in the secret place,

                when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

Your eyes saw my unformed body;

                all the days ordained for me were written in your book

                before one of them came to be." Psalm 139:13-16

I am a wonderful work of God. You are a wonderful work of God. He knew there would be muck and mire; pain and heartache; temptation and sin. So he sent his Son, Jesus, to die on a cross so that you and I could become who we were created to be - wonderful and so much more. As Christ followers we are always in a state of becoming, if we choose to get dirty and do the hard work. The nice thing is we don't have to do it alone. We can ask for help from friends and family. We can ask God for inner strength and perseverance.

Be who you are becoming. Don't wait another day.

Who are you today? Who are you becoming?